Preparing to Take in an Elder
It can be very rewarding to take in an elder like your parents or beloved relatives. Most of us have people we would love to look after as they age gracefully, but as well-meaning as you are, it is a mammoth task. Elderly people can have very specific needs, and you will need to make sure you are competent enough to meet them. Then there is the question of space, as they will also need some privacy and their own room. It is hard, but here are some considerations.
Look for Local Help
It is a remarkable thing to want to help someone in need. It is often dangerous for elderly relatives to be left on their own as they aren't as agile as they once were. Then, there are age-related issues such as hearing and sight loss. Issues such as Alzheimer's and other dementia-related illnesses are also becoming more common. Fortunately, home care services in your local area can provide a range of support services to help you with care and even respite.
Taking care of someone else can be like a full-time job. And you will also have other responsibilities. Children, work, and life in general are sure to get in the way. Of course, the kids might love having grandma come live with them, and this can be an excellent way to keep those special bonds. Yet you will probably need help sometimes. Look into local charities, church and support groups, and in-home care services that can help you out, even if it's for a few hours.
Think About the Need to Take in an Elder
There are many needs that will come with taking someone in. And unless you can dedicate 100% of your free time to care, there will be challenges that you will face along the way. However, there are some considerations you can think about, such as the following:
Ask for support from other family members if any are available.
Consider the safety of your home and make necessary changes.
Ensure you are competent to take care of any ongoing medical needs.
Learn how to help with the sensitive personal hygiene needs of another.
Make yourself available for the necessary social interactions your elder needs.
Every elder relative will be different, and the amount of support you can provide is often limited. This can lead to feelings of guilt. Yet finding support from family and friends, learning about how to care for someone, and managing time for social, mental, and physical care will all help.
Take It Slowly at First
It is challenging to care for someone if you have no prior experience. And you aren't alone if you feel overwhelmed. It is even becoming too much for professional care services to handle, especially in countries like the UK with an aging population. In 2022, UK councils received 1.37 million support requests for the elderly, which the current system (including the NHS) cannot handle. It can help to take it step by step as you learn to care for someone in the way needed.
Starting slowly can be as simple as attending appointments with your relatives so you get an understanding of their specific medical needs. But always get express permission for this. However, just driving them to the clinic is a massive help for someone with limited mobility. It also helps to ask medical professionals for advice. Anyone worth their salt will always be more than happy to help. And remember, you can't look after someone if you don't look after yourself.
Adapt Your Home for Care
You will need to make changes to your life and home to accommodate an elder who needs care. Whether your home is small or large, looking after an elderly relative will require that changes be made, and this can be disruptive. However, you can make it easier with these changes.
Make necessary changes for limited mobility
Limited mobility can mean someone needs to use a walking stick, has trouble getting around, or needs a wheelchair. Consider how they will interact with your home and make changes. For example, make doorknobs easier to turn, install ramps for chairs, and adapt rooms with rails.
Enhance security and create safety zones
The most used parts of your home are the ones you will need to change the most to accommodate an elder. These are generally entryways and halls. You will need to begin with the outside with things like ramps. Also consider kitchen areas for cooking healthy food with them.
Ensure bathrooms are safe for your relative
The bathroom can be one of the most dangerous places, even for the able-bodied. For the elderly, they can be very hazardous. Secure the bathroom for your elders with devices such as grab bars, slip prevention, and, of course, easily foldable chairs in the shower and the bath.
The changes you will need to make to accommodate your elderly loved one can be minor or drastic, depending on their needs. However, any conditions can get worse, and you can make changes as and when they are needed. These can begin to cost, bringing us to the next point.
Prepare a Room to Take in an Elder
As mentioned, you will need to adapt your home when taking an elderly person into your home for care. But they will also need a room of their own for privacy, dignity, and to get on with their lives. A room with an en-suite bathroom is ideal, but you can also consider these as well:
Make sure the room has furniture arranged to accommodate wheelchairs.
Provide a nice view of the outside world and easily accessible windows.
Facilitate as much as possible in one room to enhance independence.
Install a lift into the room if this is affordable and possible.
Clear the room of trip, slip, and fall hazards that are unsafe for elders.
Essentially, it is best to provide a room that is easily accessible, safe and secure, and has the necessary facilities. All of these will make care easier and ease the burden on you and your relatives. Access to a nice view of the outside world and fresh air will help with mental health.
Consider the Finances for the Task
Making changes, buying supplies, and even feeding an elderly relative will cost money. Using the UK as an example, the costs per week to care for one elderly relative can add up to around £1,600 on the more severe end. This is why it also helps to ensure your elders can get their affairs in order if they are of sound mind to do so. This ensures any money they have saved can go towards their care and quality of life, yet there are a few things to consider about funding.
Financial health is essential when it comes to care. Any savings your relative has can contribute to care. Or you can contribute whatever you can from your own money. Of course, there are also services that can provide financial assistance, such as Medicare and Social Security Disability Insurance in the US. It is also possible your elder relative has private insurance that covers some care costs, and you can also claim tax breaks and Family and Medical Leave.
There is always help available from local services, charities, and government bodies when you take in an elder for care. However, it is a huge responsibility that requires changes to your life and home. Yet all the changes come with expenditure and a considerable financial cost.
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